Friday, April 17, 2015

My Latest Challenge

So lately I’ve been feeling like my life is passing me by and nothing exciting is happening. I’ve also been really down for some reason. I’m working on not obsessing over analyzing people’s motives and intentions and instead working on myself more. There are some things I’ve yet to heal from and it needs to happen. I’ve realized that instead of working on the broken relationships in my life, I first have to work on my relationship with God. The hurts in my life have left me a bit skeptical of people and that’s why I’ve been driving myself crazy wondering why the act the way they act and what the motives are behind those actions. And as a result, all I’ve been left with is confusion and no answers. I realized that it’s not my job to figure out why people do what they do and that me doing that is pointless and time consuming, not to mention unproductive. So here I am, learning to trust and depend on God! And believe me, it’s not easy. My lack of trust in my physical life has crossed over into my spiritual life and that needs to change. I’m so grateful that God doesn’t love the way humans do and he continues to be patient and merciful with me. My therapist gave me the challenge to stop trying to analyze people’s motives, but to instead go all out for Jesus and see what God does. So instead of trying to be the perfect daughter, I’m going to pray for my parents and work on all the pain and resentment I actually have against them with God. Instead of wondering why a guy says one thing and does another, I’m going to stop initiating plans, work on myself, and give my love life over to God. Instead of trying to impress the worship team and prove myself worthy of being on the worship team, I’m going to work on why I joined in the first place: to Praise God with my voice. And instead of analyzing why certain people decide to be my friend when it’s convenient to them, I’m going to let things run their course meaning no more chasing people and focus on the amazing friends I do have. So there, that’s my challenge! It’s a tough one but I’m quite curious and excited to see how God works and transforms me in the process.


---> Challenge Accepted God, Now let’s do this right!!

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